The lost art of face-to-face communication (Communication Matters)

Technology can add to communication breakdown.

I have a blunt message to all supervisors, managers, and in particular executives: Stop whatever you’re doing, get out of your office and talk to your people.

Many companies I work with have lost, ignored or never cultivated this fundamental skill. Consequently face-to-face conversation is disappearing. This lack of personal connection between management and employees has a substantial negative effect on everything from individual performance to team effectiveness to company culture. The great irony is that management is about working with people, it’s not closed doors, voice messages or memos.

Being a consultant, I would like to say that I’ve had an organizational epiphany related to this concept, but the reality has been somewhat less dramatic. I was recently in a meeting with an executive who showed me an e-mail he had just received from a colleague.

The note asked for information in what seemed like an abrupt and directive tone. My client was offended and was about to craft an equally harsh response. I suggested taking a moment to visit his colleague — interestingly he discovered that the abruptness was not the author’s intention.

What’s scary about this scenario is that it happens all the time and represents only the tip of the iceberg. What lies below the surface is a disturbing trend, the notion that electronic communication (e-mail and voice mail) is the most effective method for communicating and that face time with employees or colleagues is a luxury, not a necessity. I hear, see and, in many cases, deal with the consequences of this way of thinking. Without occasionally sitting across from someone in the same room you miss the context, tone, ability to question and feedback — all the wonderful ingredients that make communication work.

Here are a few situations that I’ve recently encountered:
•I was facilitating a strategy planning session where it became clear that while some of the participants understood the purpose of the discussion, others were uniformed and openly adversarial. It seems that the manager who owned the plan had met with some of the participants in advance of the session, but not the others. Understandably, this latter group felt slighted and had no context, or appreciation, for the plan. Consequently they did not support it.
•A department head from a company where I was working on a project had resigned a month earlier. Several employees approached me “off-line,” expressing concerns about the situation and its impact to the department. They wanted to know why the person quit, who’d replace her and what my thoughts were?
Sadly, I knew more than they did on the subject but no one had communicated with the group. What’s clear is that they were distracted by her departure and instead of focussing on their jobs they were trying to get answers.
•A friend called me the other day to catch up. We chatted about work and she mentioned she was eagerly anticipating her review and was expecting a promotion.
However the meeting had been put off three times and this was causing great stress. Was this a bad sign? Was her boss avoiding telling her bad news? The cancellations were all done by e-mail so there had been no chance for dialogue.

These events reveal the issues that can arise when communication breaks down. If the managers in each case had taken the time to communicate — and do so face to face — then the concerns and frustration employees experienced could have easily been avoided.

E-mail, voice mail and the “water cooler catch-up” are useful communication vehicles, but any manager who wants to really know what employees are thinking — or conversely wants them to understand what he is thinking — should be spending a good chunk of time walking the halls.

Yes, technology provides speed, eliminates geography, allows multiple people to receive the same message at the same time, but it’s not a substitute for direct communication. Face-to-face allows people to stay connected to each other and to the business. It allows relationships to develop and ideas to flourish, and ultimately helps forge an open, honest, loyal company culture — an enormous competitive advantage.

Many managers have never learned or cultivated this fundamental aspect of the job. Further they fail to realize that they can’t be effective in their role without being a good communicator. It’s a shame because they create business issues and miss out on the human side — the chance to connect, know and appreciate the people they work with everyday. So stop writing that e-mail, put down the phone, open your office door and …

Sandy French is the president of Northern Lights, an internal communication agency. He can be reached (416) 593-6104, ext. 222 or [email protected].

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